Darling Hell Misery

I can’t exactly take credit for coming up with how to describe what Cam can be these days. Describing her son as vacillating “between the most charming, darling child on earth and hell misery why are you so upset frustrated tantrums,” my friend gave me inspiration.

I’m just going to go ahead and bundle that all up and coin “Darling Hell Misery.”

Darling:
Cam’s cousins helped him get started on speaking (and a lot of other awesome things like naked trampoline-ing) during our recent visit. Our crowd pleaser is, “Have a nice day!” which comes out, “mun-a-ma-AY!!!!” very enthusiastically. Juice, cracker, apple, banana, up, pee-pee, rock, please (peez) and a form of thank you…and some other stuff. We can figure it out about 50% of the time. Largely, he just points and says, “this. This! THIS!” while we grab everything in view and try to give it to him.

Hell Misery:
After going swimming, jogging him to and from the park and playing there for hours, miraculously finding him meals he will actually eat and not throw on the floor – all after an hour nap in lieu of his regular two hours – he has the nerve not to let me eat my dinner and insist I get “up, up!”

I lovingly got up, many, many times, to be led to many, many corners of our apartment for no apparent purpose, only to go sit back down again to be screamed at, hit and bitten. And, while it’s cute he wants me to “play, play,” and grabs my hand and pulls, flipping his lid when I don’t go the two feet to the toy he then throws at my head isn’t.

I’m like: MOMMY IS TIRED. IF YOU VALUE YOUR LIFE, QUICKLY LEARN TO ENTERTAIN YOURSELF.

At least during dinner. After a day – I feel – I was a really good mom.